I have seen several posters for the new Robin Williams movie Man of the Year, and and would like to tell you what I thought of it. However, I have yet to see the movie, and probably will never do so. Will this stop me from reviewing it? Of course not. Ill simply do what I always do when I want to talk about a movie I havent seen: read the blurbs from critics and the imdb profile.
Reading what a few critics have to say is key when reviewing a movie you haven't seen. how else will you know if the movie is good or bad? You can't just stab in the dark, you need a few hints. For example, Eleanor Ringel Gillespie calls it &a toothless political satire& This tells me that the film tries to have a biting effect by making statements about the government (especially the bush administration), but ultimately falls flat. Ty Burr of the Boston Globe says &as to be one of the most frustrating dropped balls in recent multiplex memory. Apparently this thing really really sucked. Ive got to remember to tell people that next time I want to sound smart or harshly indict Robin Williams. Dezhda Mountz of E! Online says Entire chunks of the film go by with zero belly laughs& What the hell did you think? When has Robin Williams been funny as of late? Hes had so many not funny movies that he started making dramas. In the past year, hes cranked out RV, and started production on Mrs. Doubtfire 2. Leave it to a forgotten has-been to wring a sequel out of a cross-dressing movie.
Now onto the imdb profile. Robin Williams is the star. Its a comedy. Moving on. Christopher Walken is in it. That means hell show up halfway through the movie (probably with stories of something necessary to the plot shoved in his ass) give a random speech (about the thing that used to be in his ass), then leave to cash his check. Barry Levinson directs. Lately, Levinson seems to be chasing his old works such as Wag the Dog and Rain Man. The director of Rain Man is appropriate, because he is the best man suited to film a retard. As of late, hes cranked out such turds as Envy (a film coincidentally about dog shit). He also did Good Morning, Vietnam. Good morning Barry Levinson, you suck!
The official rating: 2 out of 5 stars. Why 2? 3 is too many because I know the movie sucks, but 1 is too little because I dont actually know it sucked. 2 stars ensures my ability to look like I am a reputable film snob, while minimizing damage if I am wrong. Now that I have taught you my ways, go forth, and appear important!